Speaking-as-Though

“You see,” said the wise old conductor to the new, young band member, “If you play the bagpipes then you can laugh at a man with an accordion.”  And a man who only recently has sat down on his very last Stradivarius believe that the conductor’s words were intended for any usage beyond a musical one…like, intellectually, for instance.

Tattooed on his upper neck, one ma had these words:  “When at first, I came down the streets, I laughed at the sight of myself.”  (He’s saving up to have it copyrighted as a song…or something.)

The King’s Urban Planner addressed the mixed crowd of urbans and planners with these words:

“Civilization, my friends, will either walk through you, with you, or over you.”  He concluded with a closing comment, given to him by the Royal Priest:  “Yes, my friends, it is your choice, speaking-as-though and in-the-sense that you actually have one.”  And as the band played “Lady of Spain – Go to Hell,” they danced the night away.

As she left the house each morning, her mother would remind her, “Don’t forget to whine and you might get on television.”

One man put all of his adult ideas into a bouquet and mailed them to his mother, but she didn’t want them either.

J.