The Official Transcript

For efficiency,
Life leads critics
to feel superior to their prey.
 

The official transcript shows the conversation-cum-interrogation,
to have gone like this:

“I originally wanted to become a priest so I could help people.” 
“No, you didn’t.”
"I originally wanted to become a priest so I could serve god.” 
“No, you didn’t.”
"I originally wanted to become a priest for no reason I know of.” 
“Good – now send in the next one.” 
“I originally wanted to become a thief so I could help people…”

Why wait until the last minute?
Go ahead and be pleased and thankful now.

Under certain thermal conditions,
those who say the most, have the most to say.
(We will speak of humidity anomalies at another time.)

Although it’s not widely known,
(which fact has no noticeable significance herein),
and yet, although its not widely known,
there’s one guy – one single guy – by himself,
who’s in charge of everything in the universe
that’s uncertain.

If being dumb doesn’t make you ill,
Hey, you got it made!

J.