Earth Alert

One chap who had spent a goodly portion of his life reading about, and hanging around the edges of activities such as this, finally had his own day of reckoning, and he loudly announced, “The reason this kinda stuff seems so vague and hard to describe is quite simple, IT DOESN’T ACTUALLY EXIST1”

I heard tell of this one old chap so rich (and nervous, I presume) that he kept a whole brain on retainer – just in case!

Earth Alert RF-16:

Progress always
comes too late.

I heard this one man say that now that he was almost the kinda guy he always dreamed of being, he’d about stopped dreaming…(He added that this was not actually as strange as it sounds, even to him.)

On this one planet, where on alternate days everything was either real and simple or allegorical and complex, an unknown doctor at their medical convention introduced a proposal for the organization to privately commend “Human Speech As Medicine’s Supreme Ally,” and he supported his idea by saying, “If man could not speak, we could not diagnose our patient’s ills.”  Some agreed with this, and some did not, so he pressed on by noting:  “If we could not talk, our patients could not tell us what their problems are.”  There was more discussion and some still agreed, and others did not, so the doctor added this:  “If man did not have speech, billing would be impossible.”  There was no more discussion.

J.