Diagram 041

Re Talk: 93

      There are two kinds of memory that operate in man.  I am not referring to the attempted recollection of something:  Rather, I refer to what goes on in the Yellow Circuit, mechanically; the kind of energy that is constantly surging through all three circuits, the cross-talk going on, culminating at the top of the Yellow Circuit -- in other words -- what you are conscious of.

     These two types of mechanical memory happen simultaneously.  The second wheel in the diagram, with the distinct letters, I'll call:  The immediate, pressing memory.  The bigger wheel with the nearly illegible markings, is like background memory.  Background memories are rather vague, distant, sketchy and are not part of what I am referring to as clear memory.  The vague background memory is limited, and occurs on a very low level, like a hum:  But simultaneously, this immediate memory operates, like a loud voice talking.  At all times, whatever you are doing overtly, this thing within you, is up to something:  If you can learn to tune in to the broadcast and look at it quickly enough, you will find that this loud voice stops, it disappears while you are looking.

     Here is another way to describe these two types of memory:  The immediate memory, the loud voice that you, at Line level, would take as being you, is like a radio being played very loud.  nterspersed with this loud radio, is a radio playing in another room.  This is the background memory.  You can hear this other radio in the pregnant pauses between the words of the louder broadcast. 

     There is another aspect to what I am representing with this wheel diagram.  Occasionally the background memory can get triggered and tied up with what seems to be the immediate, pressing memory. For a short time, one of these vague, illegible somethings, will be brought up to the level of a loud voice. However, it will not have the same feel, the same intensity, as the louder voice.  This effect can be triggered by an immediate circumstance, or some type of apparent, emotional energy flowing out in the form of an immediate Yellow Circuit memory.  As one of these background memories is triggered, its voice can increase to the point that it almost reaches the level of an immediate memory.  But suddenly it is gone.

     Ordinarily, the voices react to something almost faster than you can think about it.  A situation will trigger the immediate or background memories within you, resulting in some instant vocal remark, such as, "Oooh!  There goes on of those short, green people!  I can't stand to even look at them."  People believe these vocalizations are a personal fault; but they are part of what seems to be one's "I" -- in everyone -- the apparent merging of the energy and the screen of consciousness.  Ordinarily, the energy and the screen cannot be separated.  Consciousness is like a magnetic background, a blank screen.  Information pours through you, unless you are dead; but the intensity of the information determines what becomes part of your permanent memory.  For the Few, it then becomes a matter of whether or not you accept the tiger-behind-the-door's growl as being you, letting it spring out and flow through you in the ordinary way.

     What I want you to see is this natural, automatic suppressor.  Ordinary people, with no Understanding, speak of it as 'repression':  "There are aspects of me I just can't stand to think about.  Sometimes my girlfriend pisses me off, or I'll hear about some woman doing something out in the world, and these voices, these vague background dreams, come back to me.  I suddenly remember being 6 years old, standing at my mother's bed one morning after she had been very mean to me.  I remember picking up a pair of scissors and thinking, 'I could kill her now.'"  I want you to see that information simply flows through you.  It has flowed through you all of your life, much of it becoming this background memory.  There is this natural suppressor.  Things flowing through the grid will be suppressed -- based upon your natural wiring; they will not become part of clear memory.  This is part of the reason that people can deny that which seems obvious to others around them, and part of the process behind what ordinary people would call the ability to lie to oneself:  There is a reality to it.

     You cannot allow the information that comes through the projector to be imprinted on the screen.  Attempt to continually look away, and not let your consciousness take those energies as being "I".  You can do that willfully:  You can produce another suppressor.  You can willfully  construct it in yourself, right above  Line-level consciousness in the circuitry.  When you allow the screen and what seems to be the information to merge, you are done for.  When you take them as one, you are finished.  You will always be you.  You won't Understand anything; you won't Hear anything.  If you do not Understand the mechanics of man, you are doomed to remain part of them.  Without a willfully constructed suppressor, you will continue to take this information projected on the screen as being you. JC talk 93